The Cat’s Meow
701 Bourbon St. (French Quarter)
Reason: You’re desperately searching for your 3 minutes and 21 seconds of fame.
Drink: Red Bull Vodka
Drank: Red Bull Vodka
Drunk: Whatever else you need buzzed and/or pumped up enough to get up on stage and belt one out, tiger.
Meow Mixing DJ’s (who will burn you a DVD upon request), talented emcee’s (some large black-cat cowboys to add dynamism to your act, some with great voices to help you cheetah your way through a song) and a progressive mix of Kitty Litter Jingles from the 50’s through today (people often forget that neither cat’s nor jingles existed in the 40s) to purr to up on stage while a massive litter cheers you on from below (remember: the more cat milk they drink, the better you sound). Every tabby sings for free and the chasing of laser pointers around the room is non-stop. In addition to the karaoke den, there are two exterior balconies overlooking Bourbon Street, an cozy interior courtyard and a portioned off bar area – each of which provide safe retreat from groups of cougars signing “Girls Just Want to Have Fun”.
We all just want to have fun, ladies. Sadly, you are not successfully perpetuating the concept. Only if humans had nine lives could we possibly sit through you killing us softly with your song.
mindless musings:
It’s likely you have had or will soon have a Cat’s experience if:
1) You like karaoke.
2) You have a friend who likes karaoke.
3) You have a sibling who likes karaoke.
It’s extremely likely you have had and will continue to have multiple Cats experiences if:
4) You are quasi dating someone who is strangely obsessed with karaoke to a strange degree.
We pray that you’ll only have to experience this karaoke bar through one of the first three means. Because the curiosity of wanting to watch a new fling’s signing abilities on stage has killed quite a few relationships at The Cat’s Meow. We’re not joking.
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| A standing O or his O-face? This young man would experience neither after this performance. |
But if you do find yourself in a relationship situation as described in #4, put on a pair of supportive party pants and get ready to spend many a nights twisting and shouting along to your lover’s performance. If you expect to have trouble doing this, we recommend that you fantasize that your lover is Ferris Bueller rocking the Von Steuben Day Parade in downtown Chicago. Because, honestly, who didn’t want to be a part of that? We also recommend fantasizing that your lover is Sloane. But not because this has anything to do with karaoke, just the fact that Sloane is super hot. And if you accidently miss their whole performance because you were busy dwelling in these fantasies – no problem! You will undoubtedly hear a chord by chord breakdown of their 3 minutes and 21 seconds of fame for the next 72 hours. And be forced to watch the DVD recording they purchased. And the video on their iPhone they made you record.
However, if you don’t feel the need to fantasize about 1980’s teenagers to get you through the show and you actually find yourself getting turned on by your love interest’s ability to entertain…then you need to do you both a favor and buy them the coveted Cat’s Meow Bachelor/ette Package. Not only restricted to those tying the knot, this ordeal of a deal will provide you with a VIP pass to the front of the karaoke line (for you and however many members in your party), a DVD of your performance, drink tickets and a tray of Jell-O shots. If this doesn’t get your booty call’s blood bumpin’ then they just aren’t as passionate about karaoke as they let on.
And to all you other folks who aren’t sort-of lucky enough to go home with a self-performance enthusiast like those mentioned above, you should still be so lucky to get to watch others Rock the Casbah up on stage. And let us tell you, the Casbah will be rocked, on a nightly basis, and you will enjoy it. So whether you are the talent, you’re going home with the talent, or you just there to scope out the talent report; it’s a win-win situation at Cat’s Meow.
And isn’t that just Purrrfect.
“Laissez les bon temps rouler”
- The Curiosity
Insider Tip: As at most places on Bourbon, Cats will be packed on Friday and Saturday night. Thus if you’re planning on having a simple sing-along soiree past 9pm – be ready to wait in long line of fellow soiree-ists. And no matter how enthusiastic as your friends are about watching you perform, that enthusiasm tends to wane after having to watch 14 other people perform before you. Again, side step this stagnation by purchasing a bachelor/ette package and hopping to the front of the line.
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| A picture of Sloane. In case you forgot what Sloane looked like. Seriously, how could you forget what Sloane looked like? |
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